nah man...willpower

my lifestyle is always being called into question. my parents. my exboyfriend. my cousin. thats what i think of when i think of the west coast. who i used to be. miserable all of the time. quiet. kept to myself, kept it all in. let it fester. i kept those things quiet & they were okay with that. you want to know why i moved all of the way out here? because i was miserable every day. there are moments of weakness, but every day that i am out here, i am genuinely stoked to be alive. every time i see the mountains. every time i journey out on my own. its embedded in every plan i make, every thought i form. it was the most selfish thing ive ever done, i get that. & i would never mean to hurt those i love the most. but no, im not the same, & hopefully i never will be. it was awful. this isnt.